An exuberant gospel choir accompanies the story of a long-winded preacher who eats a passing dove for sustenance. During a wistful ballad, Tonto tells the Lone Ranger to ''kiss my ass.'' A stomping country tune spins the tale of a young man who drives to the wedding of a former lover-and blows both bride and groom away with a .45. No, this isn't Sam Peckinpah's version of The Graduate. This is pop songwriting as practiced by Lyle Lovett. Since his 1986 debut, Lovett, 34, has been consistently praised by critics for his wry humor and dark insights. His third album, 1989's Lyle Lovett and his Large Band, sold more than half a million copies, and his latest, Joshua Judges Ruth, is headed that way too. ''I realize that the kind of music I do is not easily played on the radio,'' he says. ''But it's okay. I get to do what I want to do. As long as I can get away with that, I'm really happy! I was lucky enough to get in on this experimental phase in Nashville-things that are not now considered mainstream country.'' Lovett has proved that he's not mainstream anything. His own albums- including Joshua, which is being marketed to a pop audience-feature a deft blend of country, gospel, folk, blues, and swing, all marked by a dry wit and twisted plots that he describes as ''conversations with God about death, women, and food.'' Now, having received glowing reviews for his latest album and having made his screen debut in The Player, Lovett's enjoying the perks that come with being the brainy crowd's hippest songwriter. One such perk has been finding himself branded a sex symbol. The tall Texan with the tapered pompadour exudes a quiet, confident folksiness, like an experienced preacher who's keeping a secret. But a sex symbol? ''I should be so lucky!'' says the unmarried Lovett. Still, there's evidence to contradict him. On her new single ''I Feel Lucky,'' Mary-Chapin Carpenter fantasizes that ''Lyle Lovett's right beside me with his hand upon my thigh/ Hot dog, I feel lucky tonight.'' Not bad for a guy whose elongated features give him the look of a claymation-figure- in-progress. Not all women are die-hard fans, though. Because of his unusual glimpses into what he calls the ''man-woman thing,'' he has been accused of misogyny. In ''She's No Lady'' (from 1987's Pontiac), Lovett sings, ''The preacher asked her, and she said I do/The preacher asked me, and she said yes he does too/And the preacher said I pronounce you 99 to life/Son she's no lady she's your wife.'' His answer to the complaints was to record a straight rendition of ''Stand by Your Man.'' ''My whole thinking was, 'If you hated that then you'll really hate this!' Once you've gotten someone's goat, it's fun to see how far you can take it.'' Pretty far, it seems. On his recent Tonight Show appearance, the reluctant hunk held his own with Magic Johnson and Bob Newhart, whose legendary dry wit looked pretty moist next to Lovett's. Backstage after the show, he let forth an embarrassed grin as he viewed his surroundings. ''What fun. Getting to do this for a living is a wonderful thing. Playing something that's musically legit, even though the point of view is a little askew, has the effect-sort of like Bob Newhart-of telling a joke and keeping a straight face. After all, as a songwriter, I'm not obligated to tell the truth.'' An observation he makes with a straight face.


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