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1 TOPLESS FERGIE The rich are different from you and me. They get more intimate financial advice. 2 WOODY AND SOON-YI What an awkward wedding that would be. ''Bride side or groom side?''
3 BRANDON LEE He chops his way through Rapid Fire well enough, but where'd he learn to act-Bruce Lee movies?
4 ROSEANNE'S BROTHER He's 31 and complains his sister hit him when they were children. She probably had to wait in line.
5 FAMILY VALUES I must have come in late. Explain to me again how single mothers cause unemployment.
6 U.S. OPEN A celebration of American fans wearing French ''alligator'' shirts and driving BMWs being parked by Haitians.
7 JERRY GARCIA SICK? The way he takes care of himself?
8 L.A. BANK ROBBERIES Heist Capital of the World. Of course, in most banks, that's the only way to get any service.
9 PATRICIA CORNWELL She writes mysteries based on her work in forensic medicine. Entertaining and they keep you from eating in bed.
10 HURRICANE ANDREW Let me guess. In about six weeks, will we get a Hurricane Fergie?
11 COVINGTON CROSS Dallas set in the Middle Ages. They're working on an episode called ''Who Lanced J.R.?''
12 HONEYMOON IN VEGAS Nicolas Cage parachutes with Elvis imitators. Wayne Newton's World.
13 UNFORGIVEN Clint Eastwood's surprise hit of the summer. Proving a new adage: No publicity is not such a bad thing.
14 DIANE KEATON She's taking Mia Farrow's place in Woody Allen's next movie. Christina Applegate must have been booked.
15 TWIN PEAKS MOVIE The latest experiment in pay-per-view TV. It's called leaving-the-house.
