You just don't stand up a pimp. That's why Van (Peter Facinelli) and Deaq (Bill Bellamy) are hightailing it through the seedier side of Hollywood in a cherry red Ferrari Spider -- until the LAPD shows up, sirens blaring. Busted and slammed onto the hood of the Ferrari, Van sasses the flatfoots: ''There's a nicer way to do that!'' Seconds later, the devilish duo has the policemen handcuffed to a pole. They'll be on time for the pimp. In this flashy Fox crime drama, keeping up appearances with denizens of the criminal underworld is a good thing.
Van and Deaq are cops -- they're just so undercover that they don't have badges. Cocreated by ''Charlie's Angels'' director McG (who helmed the pilot) and ''Lois & Clark'' vet John McNamara, ''Fastlane'' is aimed point-blank at the MTV generation -- specifically the kids who plunked down $8.50 to see last summer's hit ''The Fast and the Furious.'' So expect Van and Deaq to spend plenty of time speeding around in phat hot rods while engaging in snappy verbal sparring.
''I love 'The Fast and the Furious,''' says McG. ''I make no apology for that, and I aspire to reach that level. The goal of the show is to make it feel like an hour of film on television every week.'' As Bellamy sees it, there's a slightly more sinister objective: ''They're trying to kill us,'' he says, a little sore from being repeatedly slammed onto the Ferrari. During the pilot ''they had me jumping off this roof and I'm like, Can I get a stuntman, please? But no, because they need my face in the shot.'' Facinelli, meanwhile, is learning to love the rough stuff. ''The show only works if you believe we're in danger,'' he explains later, icing a bruised knee courtesy of an all-too-realistic fight scene.
When Van and Deaq screw up -- which is often -- they go groveling to their tough-tootsie partner, Billie (''90210'''s Tiffani Thiessen); she holds the keys to the Candy Store, an arsenal of weapons, cars, and assorted bling bling that helps them stay deep undercover. ''[Billie] may or may not be a former heroin addict,'' says Thiessen of her character, who she says was originally written as a man. ''How cool is that? This is such an unusual female role.'' Billie will likely steer clear of romance with either of her cohorts; Thiessen says it would be ''way too freaky to make out with'' Facinelli, whose wife -- ''90210'' costar Jennie Garth -- happens to be her best friend.
With an action-sequence-packed pilot that reportedly cost more than $4 million, ''Fastlane'' has a lot to live up to. McG works on the series when he's not busy shooting ''Charlie's Angels 2,'' and McNamara is running the show in the meantime -- armed with a dictionary of hip-hop lingo compiled by his 17-year-old half sister. But Fox isn't making life easier for them, scheduling ''Fastlane'' against NBC's ''The West Wing'' and The WB's new comic-book-babe drama ''Birds of Prey.'' It's ''counterprogramming,'' reasons McNamara. ''I'd be much more worried if we had a show called 'The East Wing.''' Facinelli is also feeling confident: '''The Birds of Prey' are gonna get their 'West Wing' clipped by 'Fastlane.''' Careful, pal -- or you'll be brought up on charges of aggravated punnery.
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