We weren't surprised Anna Nicole Smith attached a penis-shaped top to her soda can (on her Sept. 15 show on E!), but Jay Leno booking the stage hit ''Puppetry of the Penis''? Such gross goings-on inspired the Skank-O-Meter, rating fare from a PAX-friendly 0 to a Pamela-Tommy-video-worthy 10.
CHRISTINA AGUILERA'S ''DIRRTY'' The Top 40 trollop scrapes a bottomless barrel in her new video. Gyrating amid muscle boys and female mud wrestlers, the once-coquettish balladeer flashes a red-panty wedgie and screams, ''Sweat until my clothes come off!'' Making Britney and that python seem downright wholesome. PANTY SHOTS 36 SKANK-O-METER 8
FEAR FACTOR The NBC reality show's Sept. 30 ''weenie roast'' was a stomach-turning buffet in which contestants literally chewed the fat from the, uh, units of animals like deer and water buffalo. ''Did you get any stray hairs?'' asked host Joe Rogan. More importantly, did it taste like chicken? TIMES A CONTESTANT NEARLY GAGGED 26 SKANK-O-METER 9
THE REAL WORLD: LAS VEGAS In its first four episodes, MTV's vérité stalwart featured a Jacuzzi threesome, the suggestion of confessional-booth coitus, a pregnancy scare, and self-professed ''party animal'' Brynn Smith, who spent her first job-training session battling a massive hangover. Take that, Puck! ACTUAL/ATTEMPTED HOOKUPS 10 SKANK-O-METER 5
Realite: Reality TV justice!
Worthy winners on ''Runway,'' ''ANTM''; just desserts on ''Top Chef'' and ''SYTYCD''; bonus Kris Allen!
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'Twilight' Saga: 'New Moon'
It's almost here! Get all the latest news, photos, video, and fan commentary leading up to the big premiere
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