Jump for joy! Quake with fear! Start a newsletter! Shannen Doherty returns to TV as the host of ''Scare Tactics,'' the Sci Fi Channel's new hidden-camera practical-joke series (premiering April 4 at 10 p.m.). ''I get to play pranks on my friends and work six days out of the year,'' says the 31-year-old former ''90210'' and ''Charmed'' star. ''What could be better?'' Nothing -- except a round of stupid questions.
I thought of a good prank you could play on Sci Fi viewers. How about sneaking into their homes and replacing their ''Babylon 5'' tape collections with real-life women?
They might be excited. Is ''Babylon 5'' -- I don't know that show -- is it, like, hugely popular, and they're all just freaks for it?
Really? My God, hopefully they'll get culty about me.
How's it going at the Sci Fi Channel? Are nerdy guys hitting on you in the hallway and telling you they've got a big phaser in their pants?
Oh, nobody's hitting on me. But they can. I'm free. I'm single. I'm available. They're more than welcome to; it's good for my ego.
Settle those ''90210'' rumors once and for all: What was the secret behind Ian Ziering's early-'90s 'fro mullet?
Dude, that 'fro was hot…. We all had different times in the makeup trailer, and I think his hair time was very, very top secret. I think it was done in a corner when everybody else was gone. You know, I'm sure there was a pick involved. There had to be a pick involved.
My editor keeps a ''90210'' Brenda doll in her office. You're wearing a big hat with a white flower, floral vest, purple tie, and khaki shorts. Want me to get it back for you?
I don't need it back, sweetie, because I have three at home. My goddaughter likes to take me out of the box and play with me every once in awhile.
In ''Charmed,'' you once had to banish something called ''the Woogyman'' to save your possessed sister. I don't have a question, but I have to say I don't blame you for leaving that show.
Thank you. There's only so many Woogymen I can take in my life -- although my personal life would beg to differ.
Hey, this interview is going really well. Wait a sec -- you're not going to marry me, are you?
I might. I've been known to do that.
Wow. I thought you would've hung up by now, and I'm running low on questions. So…what's up?
Uh, nothing. I gotta go.