News + Notes

The Dream Team

Ready for 'Survivor' MVP? Here's who EW votes into the tribe.

CBS recently unveiled plans for an ''all-star'' edition of Survivor, featuring familiar faces from seasons past, including host Jeff Probst (left). With no suckers...uh, make that contestants yet confirmed to participate in the 2004 edition, we compiled our own sweet 16, including all six million-dollar winners.

RICHARD (Pulau Tiga) The original one you love to hate, and hate to see naked.

SUSAN (Pulau Tiga) Tapioca! Tapioca! Put her on the jury, and let the fur fly.

RUDY (Pulau Tiga) Honestly, where's the fun without the raging homophobe?

COLLEEN (Pulau Tiga) Pro: in a major movie. Con: ...with Rob Schneider.

JERRI (Australia) Another you love to hate, but don't object to seeing naked.

COLBY (Australia) Okay, but no more creepy sleepovers with his mommy!

TINA (Australia) She will slay you with a smile. Or just plain slay you.

ETHAN (Africa) Will he try to hypnotize the others with his magnificent mane?

TOM (Africa) As long as Big Tom still has his big-ass boil, the bumpkin is big time.

VECEPIA (Marquesas) God was on her side once, but does He do sequels?

SEAN (Marquesas) Who else is gonna put all the silly white folks in their place?

KATHY (Marquesas) Her strength: She peed on someone's hand. She's in.

BRIAN (Thailand) His strength: He starred in soft porn. He's in.

ROB (Amazon) He did all he could to win the Amazon... sans pee or porno.

JENNA (Amazon) Show of hands: Who likes chocolate and peanut butter?

CHRISTY (Amazon) Meet your new ''evil stepsisters''Jerri and Susan.

Originally posted May 30, 2003 Published in issue #712 May 30, 2003 Order article reprints