Television

Sound Bites

''You're on that wonderful series Will Under Grace. How is Brett Butler doing?'' JIMINY GLICK (MARTIN SHORT), TO WILL & GRACE'S MEGAN MULLALLY, ON PRIMETIME GLICK

''The producers of the Tony Awards received a lot of complaints after the two male songwriters of Hairspray kissed each other on stage. The producers were shocked about the complaints and said, 'We had no idea straight people watched the Tonys.''' CONAN O'BRIEN ON LATE NIGHT

''The secret to good desk sex is, uh, making sure that the pencils aren't sharp.'' GRANT SHOW, RECALLING HIS MELROSE PLACE LOVE SCENES, ON THE E! TRUE HOLLYWOOD STORY

''Hillary Clinton says she could've divorced her husband for all his infidelities but decided to get counseling instead. In a related story, Bill Clinton announced the name of his new book is What Does It Take to Get This Woman to Leave Me?'' CRAIG KILBORN ON THE LATE LATE SHOW

Originally posted Jun 27, 2003 Published in issue #716-717 Jun 27, 2003 Order article reprints