You can't see this, but we're making double guns with our fingers: ''The Love Boat'''s Ted Lange -- a.k.a. nice-guy bartender Isaac -- is coming to ''General Hospital''! Happy hour starts Dec. 10, when Lange begins a three-episode arc on the ABC soap as a judge in the murder trial of Sonny Corinthos (Maurice Benard). Playing a tough-as-nails jurist may not get Lange out of parking tickets, but Isaac's legacy gets the 55-year-old actor free drinks from barkeeps raising a glass to their idol. ''I don't mind questions about 'The Love Boat.' They're sweet,'' says the acting vet, who's recently appeared on UPN's ''Half & Half'' and ''The Hughleys.'' ''But one thing they can't do is get me on a cruise. I get offers all the time, but I'm not getting on those damn boats again.'' Not even if Charo were on board?

