Rahman is fabulously clever, and these eight absurd, linked stories suggest that he'd make a most amusing drinking buddy. So would his hero, the curiously named Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, a failed Pakistani actor and bad-guy star of America's Most Wanted reenactments. Kareem's first weakness is bourbon; his second, would-be ingenues. His ex-wife, Eileen, ''looked like coffee, pull-ups, and celery. She looked like an actress.'' At times, Kareem's drunken exploits -- his impersonation of a Bosnian refugee, his segue into porn -- are too silly for their own good. But Rahman has pop culture-speak deliciously down pat. When a coked-up, burned-out B actor brags about his latest project (''Think Dirty Dancing meets The Wizard of Oz for a drink, and they have a threesome with The Matrix''), you'll want to slap Rahman on the shoulder and order another round.


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