Book Article

Making Up The Band

Match the faux rock group to their name -- Quiz how well you know the names of fictional bands from ''Almost Famous,'' ''Singles,'' and ''The Simpsons''

Hey, hey, it's the Monkees — and more than 1,000 other faux rock groups from movies and TV compiled in T. Mike Childs' The Rocklopedia Fakebandica. The project was born when Childs needed something for his sketch comedy troupe's Web update: ''I couldn't think of anything funny, so I came up with this instead.'' But can you recall the names of the following fictitious rockers?

A
The up-and-coming '70s rock group fronted by Billy Crudup in Cameron Crowe's 2000 autobiographical film Almost Famous. (Crowe is married to Nancy Wilson, who sings in Heart, which is not a fake band.)

B
Mediocre grunge band in Crowe's 1992 film Singles consisting of Eddie Vedder, Jeff Ament, Stone Gossard...and Matt Dillon. Luckily, Eddie, Jeff, and Stone had a little group known as Pearl Jam to fall back on.

C
Mediocre grunge band in 1994's Reality Bites consisting of Nathan December, Christopher Wagner, Jack Irons...and Ethan Hawke. (Oddly, Dave Pirner and Evan Dando had cameos in the film but weren't in the band.)

D
In a 1993 episode of The Simpsons, this barbershop quartet overcomes Homer and the unpronounceable last name of dell man Apu (their manager changes it to ''D'Beaumarchais'') to win a Grammy.

E
This all-female trio, which included two real-life Playboy Playmates, changes its name from the Kelly Affair and gets sucked down the drain of sex, drugs, and...sex in 1970's classic Beyond the Valley of the Dolls.

F
In 1989's Heathers, this band's hit, ''Teenage Suicide (Don't Do It),'' motivates one zaftig fan's attempt to off herself, mostly because she isn't cool enough to be murdered by Christian Slater and Winona Ryder.

G
Jamie Lee Curtis actually learned to play a guitar solo for this band's performance in the 2003 update of Freaky Friday. Because, you see, Lindsay Lohan was in her body, and vice versa, and...oh, it's complicated.

H
Michael J. Fox's band in 1985's Back to the Future, which judge Huey Lewis calls ''just too darn loud'' to play Hill Valley High School's prom. Happily, Fox travels to the '50s and helps invent rock & roll, so it all works out.

1
Citizen Dick

2
Big Fun

3
The Pinheads

4
Hey, That's My Bike

5
Stillwater

6
Pink Slip

7
The Be Sharps

8
The Carrie Nations

Answers: A-5; B-1; C-4; D-7; E-8; F-2; G-6; H-3

Originally posted Nov 05, 2004 Published in issue #791 Nov 05, 2004 Order article reprints