TV Recap

Dumb Ann Dumber

On ''America's Next Top Model,'' the final four flop: Trying to re-create Japanese street(walker) style, the remaining girls come off clueless

America's Next Top Model | RAW DEAL Even in the land of sushi, Ann was too much of a cold fish
Image credit: Daniel Garriga/CBS
RAW DEAL Even in the land of sushi, Ann was too much of a cold fish

''America's Next Top Model'': The final four flop

Yaya, darling, we know you went to an Ivy League university. We know you are well traveled and speak other languages and write really well and read really long books. And how do we know this? Because you, Miss ''I Won Five Challenges'' Thang are constantly reminding us of your attributes and accomplishments. Enough already! You already have bad skin; the judges do not need another reason to keep you from becoming America’s Next Top Model. Besides, if you're such a rocket scientist, why couldn’t you figure out that the Milk pressroom (where the girls had a go-see) was right next door to the Milk store? Even clueless Ann was able to find it.

Anyway, the four remaining contestants were still in Japan, where the challenges for this episode consisted basically of dressing like Raggedy Ann — if Raggedy Ann were an Asian streetwalker on acid. It was comical to see the contestants painfully try to emulate the ''Japanese street style'' that fashionable Tokyo residents can pull together so naturally.

Since Norelle was sent home last week, it was Eva's turn to fill the ''ignorant American'' slot. While running around Tokyo looking for clothing stores, she complained that the street signs were ''not in English'' and wondered why all the buildings were marked with Japanese characters. Uh, because you’re in Japan? It probably didn’t help that she ran around yelling for anyone who spoke English. Here’s a tip, Eva: When in a foreign country, it helps to at least learn how to say, ''Do you speak English?'' in the native tongue.

But it was Ann who ended up showing the most ignorance. After exasperating Mr. J by not knowing anything about My Fair Lady or The Matrix, exasperating Eva by not knowing anything about Mikimoto pearls, and exasperating Tyra by not even being able to name her favorite actor, band, or model, she was given the boot. And though Ann had been blasted all season for her blandness, she finally did something with authority. After tearfully hugging Amanda and Yaya goodbye, she stalked past her former best friend Eva without a word. Meow.

What do you think? Do any of the remaining women have what it takes? What was going on with Eva and Ann anyway? And did those Japanese fashions look stylish or silly?

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Originally posted Dec 09, 2004
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