As much as we love to see a straight dude succeed in the competitive world of diva hubbying (affirmative action at work!), we can do without the whole skeevy, saggy-pants circus.
THAT CATERWAULING, BIGMOUTHED GHOST KID FROM THE GRUDGE
All right, all right, I'm scared. Now shut that gaping cake hole before Harry Knowles stumbles in and dies.
Remember when ''Hilton'' connoted nothing more scandalous than an overpriced continental breakfast? Oh, those were good times. Good times.
POST-TRIMSPA ANNA NICOLE
Congrats on your reduction. Now is there a pill to make you go away entirely?
TARA REID'S BOOB
If we had a time machine... Okay, we'd still go back and stop Battlefield Earth. But keeping the wraps on that tragic mammary ranks a close second.