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The Biggest Loser

''The Biggest Loser'': We rate the elimination ceremony

SETUP After a long day of elliptical training and being locked in rooms full of puff pastry, the losing team solemnly trudges down a winding staircase to a strange room that's supposed to be a pantry but looks and feels more like a dungeon, possibly because host Caroline Rhea (pictured) is there to greet them. Contestants carry what look like fancy covered meals but these are actually their votes for who gets eliminated.

FETISH OBJECT Gleaming silver serving plate

CATCH PHRASE First: ''It's time to cut the fat.'' Then: ''You are not the Biggest Loser'' (cue tears, even though not being a big loser is a plus in every situation except this show).

DON'T LET THE DOOR HIT YOU ON THE WAY OUT Rhea reminds contestants they must ''pack their bags and say goodbye.'' Then Melissa Joan Hart snaps her fingers, and Rhea flies away on her broom.

WHAT MAKES IT SPECIAL Before revealing his or her choice, each contestant has a mini-breakdown that includes shortness of breath, burying one's face in one's hands, and references to teamwork, love, spirit, sisterhood, or the phrase ''you can do anything!'' As they lift the covers, we hear flashy metallic sound effects hinting that someone is sharpening his knife collection off-camera (Locke from Lost, is that you?), as if in preparation to literally carve off all remaining fat.

BONUS As soon as someone is voted off, a giant glass-doored refrigerator filled with his or her favorite comfort foods goes dark. Seriously, someone better get to eat those pot pies. What a waste.