Secs Appeal

Grace, Ferris Bueller's Day Off

Screw Ferris. Grace (Edie McClurg) is the coolest character in this movie. Ferris lived in one of Chicago's uber-wealthy North Shore suburbs, his most pressing concern suburban ennui. Grace, however — she was just a secretary in that wealthy suburb. I like to think she sat in traffic, chain-smoking for an hour every morning, just to get to her desk on time. And when she finally did, who did she have to deal with? Ed freakin' Rooney, an ass of the highest order. His buffoonery must have had her constantly longing for one of those dollar margaritas her working class neighborhood's corner bar had every Thursday, but she always maintained her sweet, polite demeanor. She even took an interest in the students, as evidenced by her ability to rattle off the school's various cliques, from the ''sportos'' to the ''sluts'' and the ''dweebies.'' And yet, with that same cheerful smile on her face, she also got some good zings on Rooney, like when she casually mentions that Ferris ''makes you look like an ass, is what he does, Ed.'' Ah Grace, your sweet passive aggression won my heart. If I ever see ya on a bar stool, we're doing shots — on me. —Mike Bruno