BRUNO, BRUNO, BRUNO

It's like the producers sit him down the day of the show and say, ''Okay, Bruno, what do you want to convey about this contestant?'' They wait for him to spout out various clauses: ''Radiant! Molto! Sun-baked Spanish plains!'' and then they spin it all into a completely scripted on-air catastrophe I can only call solid gold. All the flailing really helps, too. Oh, and I enjoy it when he pumps his fist while handing out 10s to everyone. Yes, Bruno! You did it!