New DVD release ''Jumper'' isn't alone: Here are the voyages we hoped would be fantastic -- but weren't (we're looking at you, too, ''Jurassic Park'')
WHAT IT'S ABOUT: There are, apparently, people born with the ability to teleport. David Rice (Hayden Christensen) uses that power to steal. Silver-haired Roland (Samuel L. Jackson) is a Paladin, a group out to stop the Jumpers.
WHY IT DOESN'T WORK: Let's see: David is a schmuck of a character. He starts out as a selfish prat and stays that way. (Not to mention, he all but stalks and kidnaps a girl he knew from junior high, lying to her the whole time.) And it's never clear who, exactly, the Paladins are a religious organization, a division of the government and why they're hell-bent on eradicating the Jumpers. The movie's internal logic doesn't jibe, and so all we're watching is a bunch of mostly snappy special effects. Sound and fury blah blah blah.
Image Credit: Michael Gibson