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Tonight's Best TV

A DAILY GUIDE TO NOTABLE SHOWS by Jessica Shaw

7:30PM-MIDNIGHT
NBC
olympics-opening-ceremony-150

2010 Olympics Opening Ceremony

Two years ago, Beijing blew every nation out of the water with its jaw-dropping opening ceremony for the Summer Olympics. Will it go down as the best Olympic kickoff ever? Not if Vancouver has anything to say aboot it. The Canadian city will show the world what it's got during its Winter Olympics Opening Ceremony tonight, which is sure to include the always-epic torch lighting, questionable fashion decisions from several nations, and some much-needed peaceful international interactions. But don't look to us for any more details: You have a better chance guessing Victoria's secret than the content of the ceremony, which is being kept tightly under wraps by the Olympic committee. Which, in turn, makes us all the more curious. So why don'tcha tune in along with us, eh? —Kate Ward

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8-9PM
The CW

Smallville

Smallville takes aim at its own fans with an episode set at a comic-book convention, but the satire is smart and sweet. Proto-Superman Clark (Tom Welling) teams up with magician-in-fishnets heroine Zatanna (Serinda Swan) to investigate a cursed comic that turns a boy into the superhero of his geek dreams. The plot is Big meets Shazam!, but plays like a whimsical, even romantic, Twilight Zone about the relationship of fantasy to reality and the meaning of all superhero stories. It also gives you Erica Durance's Lois Lane in a Star Wars stormtrooper costume and a sexy Xena-esque ensemble. Yep: automatic A —Jeff Jensen

9-9:30PM
Cartoon, TV-PG

Star Wars: The Clone Wars

Obi-Wan goes on a mission to find a terrorist group. Dude, clean your own house first. Your apprentice is going to slaughter younglings.

10-10:30PM
Food, TV-G

The Best Thing I Ever Ate

Food Network stars talk about their favorite chocolate treats. Not to be totally lowbrow, but I defy them to find anything as yummy as a Twix. Must. Find. Vending. Machine.

11PM-MIDNIGHT
Comedy Central, TV-14-L
Season finale

John Oliver's New York Stand-Up Show

Season 1 ends with a visit from Paul F. Tompkins, who's been sorely missed since VH1 moronically canceled Best Week Ever.

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