It’s been two long weeks since our baby-stealing bout with Emma, Rumpelstiltskin and the gang, and I’ve missed you, Once Upon A Time fans. I hope that you watched last night’s episode on your brand new discounted flatscreen, and that you didn’t have to endure any pepper spray to get it. In case you missed our “burning questions” story in a recently enchanting issue of Entertainment Weekly, know this: Time’s producers have confirmed that Regina absolutely knows about the curse. Therefore, that little tête-à-tête with Mr. Hopper in the woods has me worried. I think our chipper little spiritual guide is not long for this world, friends. You don’t try to blackmail an Evil Queen and get away with it. But who knows – maybe that little Apollo Bar Easter egg just has me thinking about that other, death-happy ABC show that specialized in flashbacks and alternate realities. Let’s sink in!
Last night we finally learned all about Jiminy Cricket, who began his life in Fairy Tale as a sweet-natured ginger kid from the wrong side of the tracks. His parents were thieving old goons who used a traveling marionette show as a front for their treachery, and poor young Jiminy had no choice but to join in on the scam. “Good is another word for weak,” his mother insisted.
Jiminy’s only solace came from the chirping of the crickets that he oh-so-admired for their freedom. Unfortunately for Mr. Hopper, Jiminy’s real-world counterpart, the crickets had all mysteriously disappeared over in Storybrooke. His solace was yet to be found. Luckily, his patient-slash-curse-crusader Henry was on the case. “You’re a conscience,” Henry matter-of-factly told Hopper as he sat on the couch. “You help people see right from wrong.” Helping people see right from wrong is typically an implied part of a therapist’s job, but in this case, Henry was the one helping Hopper’s conscience.
We then cut to Emma, who was finally starting to develop a conscience of her own as she decided to accept the role of Sheriff’s deputy/savior of Storybrooke. She adorably butted heads with Sheriff Graham over his uniform requirements, which I found to be a bit ridiculous on his part. Why was a man who fights crime in skinny jeans and sweater vests boo-hooing over a leather jacket? Pot-kettle, Mr. Hipster Sheriff. Anyway, as soon as Emma pinned the badge to her street clothes, a massive explosion rattled all of Storybrooke. The explosion unearthed some old mining tunnels, and also some shattered pieces of what looked to be the Evil Queen’s old mirror. Regina, by the looks of things, was not thrilled. She had lost control of her town and her sexy Sheriff boy-toy.
“What’s down there?” Henry asked Regina in an accusatory tone as the whole town gathered round the sinkhole. Regina shooed him away, but Henry was already mapping out Operation Cobra’s next adventure in his mind. “Did you do anything different today?” he asked Emma. “Something made this happen.”
So we have already seen that Emma’s arrival made Storybrooke’s clock start ticking again, and now we know that accepting her new job literally made part of the town explode. From my perspective, Emma currently holds a lot of power. Regina has to take notice, so I’m going to predict a major power move on her part in the next few weeks. For now, she decided to stick to threatening Mr. Hopper, who was noticeably carrying around the Disney character’s token umbrella. She wasn’t happy with his therapeutic methods, and said she’d turn him into a “tiny, shrunken little creature” if he didn’t shape up.
NEXT: Hangin’ with Mr. Stiltskin