Well, this can’t be good. There’s no way it’s a coincidence that Francis collapses as Bash is getting healed by the Woman in White, right? And how is Mary going to feel when she finds out she was sleeping with Condé as Francis was bleeding from his ears? And where is Nostradamus when you need him?!
We start off the hour in Le Havre, France, where Mary’s agent, Ridley, gets himself killed by some man we’ve never seen before, who now finds himself in possession of Mary’s letters about her plans to return to Scotland. So basically, Mary’s screwed.
But she certainly doesn’t know it yet. All the queen is focused on right now is getting to the chapel on time to meet her handsome lover and makeout. She and Condé plan to leave for Scotland in a week. That is, if Condé can get out of his plans to set sail for England in two days. The lesson here: Cheating is never easy, no matter the century. And when Mary learns of Ridley’s death, the couple’s problems only multiply.
Speaking of problems, Bash and Kenna’s marriage seems to be a thing of the past when he packs up and leaves, informing her that his stuff will be moved to a new room while he’s gone. However, there is a glimmer of hope for them when Bash asks her to resist the urge to annul their marriage. He knows that Kenna is practically a magnet for kings and bastards alike—she prefers kings—and keeping his name will protect her until the right one comes along. So essentially, Bash is the nicest, but he doesn’t think that he’s the man for her.
After a brief chat with Francis about how difficult it is to lose a wife, Bash sets off to do his duty to the king, leaving Francis to deal with the inner workings of the castle, and most importantly, Catherine, who totally figures out Mary’s affair.
Despite Catherine’s questioning, Francis continues to lie for his wife, but he warns Mary against Catherine’s appetite for vengeance.
Meanwhile, someone should be warning Narcisse about Claude’s appetite for rebellion. He wakes up to find Claude in his bed, once again attempting to seduce him. (Doesn’t the girl know she should try the bath?)
Narcisse doesn’t fall for it, but instead brings the news to Catherine, who’d rather not hear about his sex life. Now that the two of them have grown closer, he thought she’d want to know, but it turns out that Catherine only likes to hear about other people’s sexcapades when it involves Mary sleeping with anyone who isn’t her son.
To be fair, that’s not entirely true. She also cares about her daughter’s sexcapades, which is why she pulls Leith away from his beloved Greer to give him a promotion: He’s now going to be Claude’s personal bodyguard. He’s responsible for keeping her “spiritual, passionate”—read: slutty—tendencies in check. And no, he’s not allowed to sleep with her.
Although that shouldn’t be a problem considering that Leith is completely in love with Greer, even to the point of lying to a Cardinal to try and get the Vatican to annul Greer’s marriage to Castleroy. Fingers crossed that the Cardinal has a thing for beards!
NEXT: Did the Woman in White just kill Francis?