I’m still recovering from Thursday night’s food coma, so let’s get right to it, Revenge-ers. It’s 2006 and Aiden’s sporting a bow tie and a bad Russian accent (see also: an unfortunate mustache). Emily struts up to the bar in a gorgeous LBD and asks for Sergei. Aiden, charmer that he is, mistakes her for an escort and directs her to the VIP area where we meet… Ashley! We knew Emily had met Ashley before the saga of the Hamptons, but who could have predicted that our posh girl was working as a, well, working girl? Ashley’s having second thoughts about offering herself up to a shady Russian character known as Dmitri, but thankfully (it is Thanksgiving after all!) Emily’s to the rescue! She trades places with Ashley, agreeing to sub (or do I mean dom?) for her.
Elsewhere in the Revenge-verse, Daniel (complete with bad haircut) is back from Harvard for a family Thanksgiving and – surprise! He’s invited his long lost grandmother Marion to dinner without telling Mom. Oops. Marion informs her daughter Victoria that her stepfather Maxwell passed almost a year ago and she’s got a new beau named Ben, whom she’s also invited to the Graysons’. At the mention of Maxwell, we’re treated to a flashback within a flashback (how meta, Revenge!), where we learn that Marion married Maxwell for the money. Very Titanic. At The Stowaway, Carl Porter tries to get Jack and Declan to leave for Thanksgiving at Grandma’s even though Jack’s already got the turkey thawing. I try not to yawn. Meanwhile, a younger and less jaded Nolan makes the announcement that Nolcorp is going public.
Back at the Russian club, Emily meets up with Takeda, who asks her if she’s afraid to carry out her mission. “No, I’m ready,” she replies coolly. In the Hamptons, Daniel drops a bomb on Conrad: he may not major in business. Conrad’s not too fazed. He’ll settle for poli-sci or pre-law as well. However, Daniel’s going in a completely different direction. He wants to be a poet. You can practically smell Conrad’s disgust, as though being a poet were comparable to being a trash collector.
NEXT: Aiden reveals where he keeps his gun.