'Secret Diary of a Call Girl' recap: Scary guys | EW.com

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'Secret Diary of a Call Girl' recap: Scary guys

After Hannah gets a bad online review, Stephanie sends a scary client to her apartment; then a one-night stand won't leave

Billie Piper, Secret Diary of a Call Girl, ...

‘Secret Diary of a Call Girl’ recap: Scary guys

If you’re like me, and you spent the week wondering what A levels were in relation to lovemaking (a Google search of ”A levels” and ”sex” uncovered naught), then you certainly know now. You also know Hannah does it, and that it’s in demand. But, more important, you know how Hannah’s first meeting with her ”agent,” Stephanie, went a year ago when she started hooking, and that Stephanie knows Hannah’s real name, but not vice versa. And that their relationship over the past few months has devolved into something weird. I don’t get if it’s jealousy, disappointment, or just being a mean boss, but Stephanie is no longer out to be Hannah’s best friend. She’s not even out to protect her.

Which brings me to another thing we finally got to see in last night’s episode: Being a slut is dangerous. I’m not referring to the crabs and the pregnancy scares (though I wish the show would cover those at some point). I mean the really creepy, nasty johns like Hannah’s punter yesterday — the ones who come to your house and still know where you live. When he entered, he was all sweet and awkward, then he turned into a domineering, paranoid bastard. I still don’t know exactly how she got him to leave — and I’m confused as to why Stephanie would send him to any of her girls, even the one with a bad online review. Oh, the review…

So Hannah and her co-whores discovered that a former client had posted a nasty write-up about Hannah on the agency’s website. The gist of it: Give this frigid lady a pass. The outcome: Hannah’s workload thinned out quickly. I wondered why a commercial site belonging to an escort service wouldn’t censor its posts a bit (even some news sites do it) to get rid of the damning ones. But who am I to argue with Call Girl’s support of freedom of speech? Desperate, and apparently getting to bed before midnight (odd for a hooker, I would think), Hannah accepted an out-of-the-ordinary late-night in-call from the aforementioned lunatic. Big mistake, yet not totally her fault: Stephanie should have mentioned that she’d dealt with him before and knew this guy was trouble.

My guess: It was some sort of test of Hannah’s mettle or a punishment for her bad behavior. Forget the critical review — Hannah did leave a punter stranded at a party, and she did double-dip on clients off the books. She’s also pretty cocky, always talking back to Stephanie at their meetings. Nevertheless, she was totally in the right when she told Stephanie that if this happened again (bad review or not), she would hightail it to another agency and tell the other girls that this madam was not to be trusted. (Do I sense a plotline in the future where Hannah dabbles with another escort service? Oh, how Naomi.)

NEXT: The thing that wouldn’t leave