The word bubble can evoke fun: taking a bath, drinking champagne, manically popping packing material. But there’s nothing cheery about TV programming ”bubbles” — broadcast shows that are anxiously awaiting their renewal fates. Even the industry’s most successful producers are not immune. David E. Kelley’s legal drama Harry’s Law is considered a long shot for a third-season pickup, despite its ranking as NBC’s second-most-watched scripted show this season (the average rating for the season to date is 8.7 million) after Smash.
I haven’t cried this much since my childhood pet died. I came close when Justin Timberlake announced his engagement to Jessica Biel. I mean, he clearly didn’t see Stealth! Yikes. But my emotions went through a literal ringer – get it? – when Babbabooie Macawi ripped apart Siobhan’s GINORMOUS PHOTO! How could they do it? Don’t they know my attachment? Also, CW folks, are the remnants of this portrait laying around anywhere? I have scotch tape in my office and would be willing to move one of my posters. Would a Tide stick get out Macawi’s blood?
Sweet Siobhan Martin! That episode contained some of my favorite Ringer moments of this entire season. I love a show that go full-throttle into Crazytown and clearly it took that exit off the freeway last week when Catherine was revealed as the villain behind the whole Siobhan hit. Well, this episode went even further if that’s possible. It had Russian hookers overdosing! Secret lesbians! And a cameo from a former Dawson’s Creek cast member!! It’s basically like a buffet in Tim’s dream world!! Everything I could ever want!!
“Don’t panic. It happened again—somebody shot at me.” Only on Ringer, ladies and gentlemen!!! Bridget has already been attacked in a drafty loft but now she’s been attacked once again in a drafty, more sketchy, abandoned loft!! That was how she broke the news to Andrew about the second attempt on her life. He took it like a champ. Those Brits aren’t fazed by anything. Well except maybe finding your ex-wife dressed like Veronica Lake in your daughter’s bedroom with her wrists slit. And that brings us to my favorite moments in last night’s Ringer!!!
There’s a special guest in the April 3 episode of The CW’s Ringer, but this time he’s behind the camera. Star Sarah Michelle Gellar asked her Cruel Intentions director (and pal) Roger Kumble to take on an episode of the hour-long thriller, about plotting twins Siobhan and Bridget (both played by Gellar), and he agreed. ”I’m like human resources for all my friends,” she jokes.
Did I eat bad sushi for dinner? That was my immediate thought after I watched the opening sequence for last night’s Ringer. It was like a fever dream of craziness. Henry was being accused of murder (well that’s sorta fair). Andrew and Catherine were making out. A sniper was eyeing Bridget through a window in a scary warehouse! And then Bridget was lying on a dirty mattress with a gunshot wound! But it turned out to be a flashforward to two days from now. So there were probably too many flashbacks (At one point we flashed back to A YEAR AGO!
It’s getting real cray cray up in the Ringer world, ladies and gentlemen. We’re only about a month away from the season finale but people are dropping truth bombs like a batch of sorority girls after one too many vodka cranberries. Now last week had a truly sad lack of GINORMOUS PHOTO shots but, thankfully, producers fixed all that with a nice lingering glance at Siobhan’s black and white mug. Best of all was that Catherine was the one staring at that photo gem. You know she was just thinking something bitchy about it (If only Ringer characters had interior monologues).
Well Ringer fans you can tell we’re nearing the end of the season because the episodes are getting more and more jam-packed. I mean last night’s episode didn’t even have a shot of Siobhan’s GINORMOUS PHOTO. Clearly, there’s not enough time to indulge in my favorite item in the Martin house but there’s more pressing issues, like introducing characters with horrible names like Cash and thritysomethings texting as if they were on Gossip Girl (“Where r u”). Oh well. There’s still a few episodes left and plenty of time for gratuitous shots of the GINORMOUS PHOTO.
So Ringer recap fans, last week’s little experiment into abbreviated bitchery worked and from now on I think I’m just going to give you all my highlights of the episode. Ringer isn’t really a show that needs to be analyzed because, frankly, it’s as loopy as Anne Heche on a full moon. It’s best to just keep feelings about the show on a purely superficial level and, thankfully, your author excels at superficiality!!! Yay! My parents must be so proud. So here are the major talking points of last night’s episode which I gotta say was sort of a snoozefest.
Okay Ringer fans (special shout out to Kurtis in LA, whose awesome girlfriend Caroline I met tonight), I have news about today’s recap: It’s gonna be real short, like Warwick Davis short. Sorry but I have to catch an early flight tomorrow for EW work so I can’t stay up late and write my typical bitchfest bonanza about Ringer. So for tonight’s episode, which sadly doesn’t include the word “whore” in its title like the previous ep, I’m going to break down my favorite moments.
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